Q: Did you hear about the guy they found dead with his head in his cornflakes?
A: The police thought it was a cereal killer.
Math Problems
Teacher: If you have 4 books and I give you 3 more, how many books would you have?
Student: 7 books
Teacher: Good. Now, if you have 2947 books and I gave you 1836 books, what would you have?
Student: A library
It Hurts everywhere
Patient: Doctor, it hurts everywhere.
Doctor: Please sit down. Can you show me where it hurts?
Patient: (pressing his index finger against his head) Here (touching his stomach) Here (poking his other arm) Here (prodding his legs) Here too!
Doctor: (has a good look at the patient) I see your problem. Your body is fine. It is your index finger that is broken